Friday Workplace Humor: True Story About a Performance Review?

A Tale of Corporate Oppression: supposedly true, yet funny (at least to my warped sense of humor).

Working for a big corporation, you can feel pretty unimportant. In fact, you can begin to wonder exactly how much anybody cares about what you’re doing.

A work friend and I decided to test the water. He would stop working, and I would work like never before.

At the end of our test period, we had a performance review.

He was raised 75 cents.

I did not get a raise.

Reasons cited:

My friend: “Worked well and was barely noticable. Two thumbs up!”

Me: “Overall negative impression. Recommend employee study work habits of (my friend).”

1 Comment

  1. George, please remember that you are a lawyer. That usually means the person is an over achiever. They don’t know how to *not* work.

    You don’t say what type of work your friend does.

    Just because your friend stopped working and you “worked like never before” doesn’t really tell us a lot. If your friend is the building security guard and “stopped working” translates into did not walk the rounds but just sat at the console from start time to break to lunch, then there’s an understandable level of what not working means.

    Likewise, “working like never before” could also mean that you lowered your billable hours to next to nothing or actually

    NONE !!!

    It’s a great anecdote. But we need more parameters. After all, you know what happens when we “assume.”


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